Happy Easter from Uncle Bill

"I was over in Australia during Easter, which was interesting. Interesting to note they celebrate Easter the same way we do: commemorating the death and resurrection of Jesus...by telling our children a giant bunny rabbit left chocolate eggs in the night.

Now, I wonder why we're fucked up as a race. Anybody got any clues out there? Where do you get this shit from? Why those two things? Why not goldfish left Lincoln logs in your sock drawer? As long as we're makin' shit up, go hogwild, you know? At least a goldfish with a Lincoln log on its back going across your floor to your sock drawer has a miraculous connotation to it.

'Mummy, I woke up today and there was a Lincoln log in me sock drawer!'
'That's the story of Jesus!'

Who comes up with this shit? I've read the Bible, and I can't find the word 'bunny' or 'chocolate' anywhere in that fuckin' book." - Bill Hicks

"And all my dreams will warm and sweeter be..."

Okay, so it's April 15th, which means tomorrow is April 16th (Easter Sunday). But more importantly, it means we're only two months away from Bloomsday 2006.

This will mark the fifth year in a row that I have not been able to attend the festivities in Dublin, and, as always, that makes me very sad. :(

So, for what it's worth, here's my all-points bulletin: If some generous benefactor would like to send a nice, literary-minded young man to Ireland to pursue his longstanding interest in the writings of James Joyce, please, drop me a line. I won't go so far as to promise anything in return just yet, but I can guarantee you that it would make me almost frighteningly happy...Like this:

Thank you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to looking after my neighbor's moody little Pomeranian.